Parent education is a growing field in the area of family life
education.
More and more parents are turning to classes and small groups to
help them navigate the challenges and joys of parenthood.
Parent education programs differ in the information and skills
they present. Some emphasize methods of discipline while others
focus on teaching children how to problem solve. Most consider
developmental stages. Some take the next step of helping parents
understand how their behavior must change in response to their
child’s developmental stage.
In this column, I suggest some questions to help you evaluate
and choose the courses or classes that will best help you on your
parenting journey.
When participating in a parenting class, always consider the
reliability of the information by asking the following
questions:
What is the evidence?
What are the credentials and experience of the person giving the
information?
Does the information make sense?
Does it fit my experience?
What do others say?
Always consider the appropriateness of skills for your
children.
All parenting curricula and instructors bring with them a
philosophy that informs the material they are presenting.
Unfortunately, few parenting curricula explicitly communicate their
underlying beliefs and assumptions.
Harriet Heath, a developmental psychologist and member of the
guidance team for the National Parenting Education Network,
encourages parents to not be afraid to inquire about the underlying
assumptions of a parenting program.
She suggests these questions to help parents get to the heart of
a curriculum:
What kind of person is viewed as ideal? People and programs
goals vary extremely. One might value and, therefore focus on
immediate behavior, such as having children potty trained or having
children obedient.
Another might incorporate those goals into longer term ones,
having children potty trained and in the process having them be in
tune with their bodies.
A program might incorporate having obedient children with having
them become able to think through issues and wanting to know why
doing something requested is a good idea.
What conditions support children’s developing toward this ideal?
Some programs assume children will naturally attain the ideal for
that child. Others assume children need a close relationship with
their parents. Others include a stimulating environment. While
these are not mutually exclusive conditions, it is not uncommon for
a curriculum to have a greater emphasis on one more than
another.
What reason is given as to why children change? Assumptions
about motivation make a continuum. One extreme assumes that
children are inherently motivated to change. At the other end
children change only when motivated through a process of rewards
and punishments.
What is the parents’ role? It might be seen as that of a
participant actively involved in supporting and guiding the
development of the child, a bystander supporting the development,
or a director deciding what is to occur.
As a parent, you should be able to identify your beliefs and
feel free to inquire about foundations of the parenting program you
are participating in.
From this vantage point, you are able to compare a program’s
strengths with your needs and values. Choosing a parenting program
should be based on more than the convenience of time and
place.
The investment of a little time up front to discover the
foundation of the information and skills of the program will result
in a much better return for both you and your children.
Rich Batten is the father of four, a certified family life
educator and the family and consumer science agent for the Colorado
State University Cooperative Extension Office in Douglas
County.